mlerules

The last few days've been hard. A Dear Friend passed away on Saturday afternoon. I'd stopped by to say g'bye a couple hours before. The end was nigh, but apparently even closer then we'd thought. I sat in the living room, next to Michael in his hospital bed, and told him much I'd appreciated how he & his wife, Gina, had made me feel so welcome when I moved to Portland back in March 2007, &c. He wasn't really conscious, but perhaps he heard me. (The phrase "death rattle" is real.)

Ended up sticking around (masked and keeping distanced as much as possible) to sous chef for another friend who'd shown up to make dinner after saying his g'byes. Just past 3pm, I walked back into the living room just when G said aloud "he's taken his last breath" and watched her close his eyes. Some folks who showed up to say g'bye didn't get the chance. An impromptu wake happened outside w/those who were around. Folks said nice things about M and we all toasted his passing.

Yesterday I drove G to River View Cemetary to meet w/the funeral director. So surreal, especially these days. I'll return on Thursday for dinner and to keep her company and to see how else I can help this transition. They recently had their 30th wedding anniversary (2nd marriages for both).

Today was a really good day of getting stuff done here at home (Hive Magnum). Initially 'twas just me (laundry galore, running errands, taking care of this 'n' that, &c.) Then a friend came over w/good food and helped me build a pea-arbor/harp/whatzit to let my snow- & snap-peas grow even higher. (What a difference a week of good growing weather makes! My recent travels coincided w/lotsa sun and rain and my garden enjoyed it mightily.) Another friend came by eventually and pitched in w/weeding and then hanging more art on my walls. The first one left and the second stayed for pizza and extended Fellowship of the Ring watching.

My recent Toad Rip was MARVELOUS. Lotsa great Nature and outdoors stuff and man-made stuff and one of the most fun weddings I've ever attended. I enjoyed tide pools, lighthouses, ocean sunsets, gardens, redwoods, Kinetic Grand Championship boat/float race, another lovely river drive along CA's Hwy 96 aka Bigfoot Byway, The Feckin' Tinkers at Oberon's in Ashland after a delicious dinner at Lark's, &c. Approx 85% of the folks at the wedding are or were HSU Lumberjacks (marching band members). For a chunk of time during the wedding, they all played for the dozen or so of us who weren't (or who'd come from too far away so didn't have their instruments). It was GREAT - and what a fab start to their married life together!

Meanwhile, a dear friend w/terminal cancer (jaylake) has gone into his final decline. He's now in hospice care at home. Dunno if'n I'll see him again, although I may take a caretaker shift to spell his partner next week if need be. It's really hard. Everything's currently happening in my world as if I'm in an aquarium looking out through thick glass and lotsa water. Rice paper walls. Not grieving yet, but my heart's getting ready. *sigh*

Remembering the importance to live life well NOW, because we never know what'll happen next or how much time we'll actually have. Luckily this is indeed how I DO live already, although the past couple of years've certainly slapped me hard across the face w/the importance of this always, intentionally.

Wow. Just got an e-mail from a Dear Friend (& pseudo-step-sis) who's adding new depth to her career as a hospice nurse with s'more very closely related functions. Here's what she has to say: ( about the idea of a Home Funeral Guide/Certified Death Midwife )