Brain Dump
Apr. 17th, 2006 12:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mlerulesBack to Displaced Passions. Passion: intensity, focus, prioritized highly, valued highly (more goes here). Wanna live passionately, even if without specific passions! People are often my passion. Diff ones...here, there, everywhere. Joy spreads like a gas to fit the container it's in...which if'n the container's open-ended get interesting: the key lies in containing the container: finding boundaries...and often stretching 'em to accomodate new joy(s)...but not letting the joy get too dilute too long at any particular time.
Conservation of Energy. Conservation of (What) Matter(s). Someone recently referred to time as temporal space, a twist I quite like. Fits in w/my now & again view of r-ships as involving (and requiring some notice of and consideration given to) wavelengths: when folks match up or don't, 'pending on circs, inclinations, whathaveyou. Match up vis-a-vis: time avail, activities prioritized, passions/obsessions currently followed, req'd To Do's, emotional energy avail. This last one raises interesting qxs: the amount and type(?) of emotional energy gained and expended in various situations: work, fambily, other and/or mixed social interactions of differing sizes in various locales.
When I headed off to the last party I attended, I'd been tired and dragging earlier in the eve but then energized myself w/the prospects of a party, then when I drove back and forth, fruitlessly consulting the Thos Bros gd (SoCal's Bible for drivers), my enthusiasm began to wane...ultimately, though, I went and had a most pleasant, good, and nice time w/some damn interesting folks.
I can gain more energy than I expend in social situations, even if filled w/folks I don't (yet) know. Amusing, as in and amongst several of my social constellations I'm the "Token E" (as in Extrovert), so when I relate my upcoming or past adventures I get gasps of "you did what?!" when I tell 'em about hitting a get-together when I recognize exactly three (3) people - one I've known for several years but not hugely well, another I've met twice and haven't really interacted much with at all, and finally someone I saw once at another recentish get-together and only spoke to when I initiated introductions, not getting beyond "Hi, I'm..." whereupon I promptly forgot his name - and the two (2) most-well known ones leave well before I do. Each and every person has something to offer, some spark to light some fire somewhere within, some passion...it's a matter of finding it out, of educing it from within...that is if'n it's not right there on the surface glittering and glowing and ablaze like a ball of fire - that makes it far easier.
Right now I'm finding so many bright shiny possibilities competing for my attention...yet am aware that if'n I'm serious 'bout a few things, I need to scale back the plans, withdraw and cocoon a bit, focus and accomplish certain things. "But I want it ALL, daddy, NOW." (Thinking Veruca Salt but the quote might not be quite right.)
Conservation of Energy...yet transmutation occurs...shifts happen...what matters most: well, that's the qx now ain't it?! What do I have to give? Two-hands, a fairly strong (if currently not as energetic as I'd like) bod, an open mind, an open heart, a willingness to try, a desire to help out, an interesting (if shifting) perspective. What do I have to do to keep being able to give it? Well, this is the qx, now isn't it?!
Just made plans w/someone I met over the weekend to go see Ashes & Snow later in the week: http://www.ashesandsnow.org/en/exhibition/nomadic-museum.php The structure itself appeals as much as - as an integral part of - the exhibition itself. In particular, I long to see now "a diaphanous handmade curtain made of one million pressed paper tea bags from Sri Lanka is suspended from the ceiling, floating 40 feet above the floor." Damn, OCD produces some wonderful things in this world! It's much of why I still want to watch "Bee Season" sometime. There's a scene in the book where...well, I won't give it away and perhaps it's not that great in the movie so I don't wanna get my (or anybody's) hopes up.
'Cause the higher your hopes go, the harder they crash and longer they burn. And the further you fall, the longer and harder it is to crawl up outta the hole (pit) and return to...wherever one returns to, 'cause "Normal" doesn't seem appropriate, neither does "Square One," 'cause it doesn't seem square: more likely round...w/rivulets...okay, then, it's a labryrinth. Missed Friday's LabWalk...may...no, WILL go do it myself soon. It's time. It's needed. And now, food's needed...
Conservation of Energy. Conservation of (What) Matter(s). Someone recently referred to time as temporal space, a twist I quite like. Fits in w/my now & again view of r-ships as involving (and requiring some notice of and consideration given to) wavelengths: when folks match up or don't, 'pending on circs, inclinations, whathaveyou. Match up vis-a-vis: time avail, activities prioritized, passions/obsessions currently followed, req'd To Do's, emotional energy avail. This last one raises interesting qxs: the amount and type(?) of emotional energy gained and expended in various situations: work, fambily, other and/or mixed social interactions of differing sizes in various locales.
When I headed off to the last party I attended, I'd been tired and dragging earlier in the eve but then energized myself w/the prospects of a party, then when I drove back and forth, fruitlessly consulting the Thos Bros gd (SoCal's Bible for drivers), my enthusiasm began to wane...ultimately, though, I went and had a most pleasant, good, and nice time w/some damn interesting folks.
I can gain more energy than I expend in social situations, even if filled w/folks I don't (yet) know. Amusing, as in and amongst several of my social constellations I'm the "Token E" (as in Extrovert), so when I relate my upcoming or past adventures I get gasps of "you did what?!" when I tell 'em about hitting a get-together when I recognize exactly three (3) people - one I've known for several years but not hugely well, another I've met twice and haven't really interacted much with at all, and finally someone I saw once at another recentish get-together and only spoke to when I initiated introductions, not getting beyond "Hi, I'm..." whereupon I promptly forgot his name - and the two (2) most-well known ones leave well before I do. Each and every person has something to offer, some spark to light some fire somewhere within, some passion...it's a matter of finding it out, of educing it from within...that is if'n it's not right there on the surface glittering and glowing and ablaze like a ball of fire - that makes it far easier.
Right now I'm finding so many bright shiny possibilities competing for my attention...yet am aware that if'n I'm serious 'bout a few things, I need to scale back the plans, withdraw and cocoon a bit, focus and accomplish certain things. "But I want it ALL, daddy, NOW." (Thinking Veruca Salt but the quote might not be quite right.)
Conservation of Energy...yet transmutation occurs...shifts happen...what matters most: well, that's the qx now ain't it?! What do I have to give? Two-hands, a fairly strong (if currently not as energetic as I'd like) bod, an open mind, an open heart, a willingness to try, a desire to help out, an interesting (if shifting) perspective. What do I have to do to keep being able to give it? Well, this is the qx, now isn't it?!
Just made plans w/someone I met over the weekend to go see Ashes & Snow later in the week: http://www.ashesandsnow.org/en/exhibition/nomadic-museum.php The structure itself appeals as much as - as an integral part of - the exhibition itself. In particular, I long to see now "a diaphanous handmade curtain made of one million pressed paper tea bags from Sri Lanka is suspended from the ceiling, floating 40 feet above the floor." Damn, OCD produces some wonderful things in this world! It's much of why I still want to watch "Bee Season" sometime. There's a scene in the book where...well, I won't give it away and perhaps it's not that great in the movie so I don't wanna get my (or anybody's) hopes up.
'Cause the higher your hopes go, the harder they crash and longer they burn. And the further you fall, the longer and harder it is to crawl up outta the hole (pit) and return to...wherever one returns to, 'cause "Normal" doesn't seem appropriate, neither does "Square One," 'cause it doesn't seem square: more likely round...w/rivulets...okay, then, it's a labryrinth. Missed Friday's LabWalk...may...no, WILL go do it myself soon. It's time. It's needed. And now, food's needed...
